Thursday, August 26, 2010

Gay vs. Christian Debate

My church's sermon last week talked about homosexuality and what the bible has to say about it.  The sermon was tying into the series of Unbiblical Animals - Cows and Elephants in the Room.  (Or open concerns that no one talks about) I have to say, last Sunday's sermon was the best.  I can't tell you how much people are hurting due to Christianity's passing judgements on homosexuals.  It really hurts me to see that.  Pastor Andrew Vargas was the preacher last Sunday and may I say, did a phenomenal job.  This is no easy subject to preach about but he got across the point -- Homosexuality is a sin, but it is no worse a sin then saying a little white lie.  Somehow Christians have come to believe that being gay is the most unfathomable sin and your going to go to hell for even thinking about it.  How can they be any worse then I am? I have sins, I'm human! The bible clearly says, "for ALL have sinned and fallen short of the glory of God." (Romans 3:23).   By those standards, I should be going to hell, everyone should be going to hell.  But it's only by God's amazing grace that you or I can be saved.  We need to love God with all our heart, mind, soul, and strength. 

I want to reference the verses Pastor referenced to show that in fact, the bible does say homosexuality is a sin:
"Do you not know that the wicked will not inherit the kingdom of God? Do not be deceived: Neither the sexually immoral nor idolaters nor adulterers nor male prostitutes nor homosexual offenders nor thieves nor the greedy nor drunkards nor slanderers nor swindlers will inherit the kingdom of God. And that is what some of you were. But you were washed, you were sanctified, you were justified in the name of the Lord Jesus Christ and by the Spirit of our God."  1 Corinthians 6:9-11
Or you can also check out these verses as well that Pastor gave:
- Genesis 2:24
- Leviticus 18:22 and 20:13
- Mark 10:6-9
- Romans 1:24-31
- 1 Timothy 1:9-10

To me, homosexuality is the same level of sin as me eating away my problems.  I'm committing gluttony which the bible also says is a sin.  I struggle everyday to overcome those temptations of eating.  Thankfully God has been helping me.  One day at a time He is there so I can learn.   

To those of you out there who struggle with homosexuality.  I sincerely apologize.  Sincerely apologize for judging you, for looking at you differently, and for not seeing past your sins and loving the sinner.  After all, I am a sinner too.  My wish is to be loved also, so why shouldn't I love you?  I've changed.  I want you to know, I love you no matter what you do.  Please forgive me.  I know this doesn't make it right for my actions, and I am really sorry, but my honest heart cry is that you'll forgive me for hurting you. 

If you want to check out Pastor's sermon regarding this, follow the link below.



Tuesday, August 24, 2010

Reacurring Revelations

It never ceases to amaze me how I still haven't learned to read my bible every day.   The Lord's convicted me and convicted me.  I bear witness to the countless of times I've become so vulnerable to the enemy when I fail to read my bible for extended periods of time.  Some days I just get so excited to read and then there are days when I look at my bible and think it's a chore.  Before I know it a whole week has gone by.  I am thankful however that these so called, "Periods" are scaled down a bit.  I remember times where it would be months at a time.  That was a long time ago.  I seem to be one of those people who love extremes on both ends.  I will read my bible extensively for a while, and completely drop it out of my life for another period of time.  The whole routine just repeats itself continuously.  Take water for instance.  I drink water in periods as well.  There a months where I drink 5 water bottles a day, I just crave it.  Then I can just stop, and before I know it, I'm not even drinking water anymore and for months on end I might add.  That can't be good for me. 

This week has been trying, very trying and I blame my lack of persistence, because I've only picked up my bible maybe once for personal reading.  I guess I just can't stress enough the fact how everything seems so much harder, worse then they actually are, or how cravings and temptations outweigh me when I simply skip reading my bible.  And whats worse, I feel completely distant from God when I do.

Well I've said it myself, the benefit of reading my bible is way more than saving a few minutes and not reading.  So, the question is, when will I learn???

Tuesday, August 17, 2010

Honesty With A Sincere Heart

I've been blessed, extremely blessed.  I've been learning a lot of things, and growing in my walk with the Lord.  He's been so good to me, words can not express how thankful I am to my Heavenly Father.  But... questions arise within me. 

I am going to be honest, having gone to Mercy Ministries to finally get "rid" of my problem with overeating, I am able to say, I still fall weakness to this temptation.  I rebuke it in Jesus Name! (Don't want the devil to get a hold of what I just said) Since my 1 1/2 years after Mercy, I've struggled with it on and off and my God has really been helping me along this path. Take for instance, something amazing happened a few weeks ago at Church and I really felt the God just gave me Mercy over my addiction and renewed me, just refreshed me to a new beginning.  It's been tremendous since then.  I have felt that I just got off a long healthy fast.  Eating was not even a problem after that, I can't begin to describe how wonderful it was.  God is just so unfathomably amazing. He's done so much in my life.  But the past couple days I have been my old self again.  It leads me to thinking, "What went wrong? What did I do? Did I not read my bible enough? Did I not pray enough? Did I not do this? Did I not do that? Why did I just eat this?" and all the thoughts that come along side that.  It was really confusing to me when I realized my errors in eating.  I kept thinking that I ruined what happened on that Sunday a few weeks ago.  Why can't what happened be a permanent fix? Eating is just so hard for me.  In all honesty, this problem is just too much for me.  I'm extremely sick of it, tired of fighting it, but yet somehow at peace because I feel as though I have been able to depend on God way more in trying to fix this problem. 

I have to wonder if I will ever get a permanent fix for my emotional eating or will I be having my good days and bad days the rest of my life. Will I ever get to the point where God has completely freed me from this problem or at least enough to make the good days far outweigh the bad days? I'm not too sure of these answers.  I guess I'll just have to keep taking it one day at a time like I've been doing and always realize,  This problem IS too big for me, I must always depend on God.  It is only because of Jesus that I have gotten as far as I am.  I never would have dreamed to be here today and having accomplished so much.  But do you know what? It's not even been how God has been helping me in my problems but the best part is how close we have gotten through out all of this.  I've been praying to get closer to God since I was a little girl.  I'm finally to the point where I've become vulnerable enough to God to let him completely in my life.  Give everything to Him.  Even the things I completely hold dear.

Monday, August 9, 2010

Peculiar Epiphany's

Through out the last few months, I've noticed something peculiar.  A peculiar epiphany that slightly makes me happy but also never fails to let me know, I'm in need of prayer.  I've been having major breakthroughs in the area's of my main weaknesses and my golly gee whitakers! That does NOT make the devil happy! :) (Which makes me happy and I love my happiness over his!)

The breakthroughs have been tremendous varying in range from small to huge with great results.  God has been so amazing.  And I say that not lightly but in the full context of the terms I used.  God is seriously AMAZING. I give him all the Glory because everything that has happened to me has all been due to what He has done.  I am simply just trying to tag along and listen and be obedient to Him. 

Now to get this straight, I have never been the type of person to have "dreams" or "nightmare's".  Usually my sleep is uninterrupted peaceful bliss.  But even more recently I've been noticing a change.  On the days when I have breakthroughs I get dreams at night, bad dreams.  I wouldn't say nightmares because they don't scare me, but just bad dreams.  Dreams that usually consist of me indulging in my past sins, as if to remind me how good it felt when I took part in my old sins.  I wake up confused and can remember my dreams vividly.  It makes me happy to know the devil apparently feels threatened enough to try and bring me down, but like I said earlier, makes me realize I am in definite need of prayer.  There is a spiritual battle going on and I have to put on my full armor of God and stand firm.  These times in my life can require no slip in my nightly bible readings or my prayers to God.  Every one of those things are needed to help me get through this.  I can't take the chance to be vulnerable to the devil.

Over the weekend I felt God impressing upon me through other people and Sunday's sermon that I need to keep up with my bible reading.  It had been a week since I read my bible last and so I realized my loving correction and made it a point to read last night no matter how late I stayed up.  (which seems to have been my consistent excuse to not read this past week).  It was one of those nights where I thought it would be just good to let God pick where I read, so I got to where I thought He was leading me and low and behold, this was the first verse I read... And boy! Was it an eye-popper!
"Arise, shine, for your light has come,
and the glory of the LORD rises upon you."
Isaiah 60:1 ((NIV)
It struck me in a very personal way, which would be waaaay too long of a story for me to tell you! :) And from this verse I received a, again personal, breakthrough! It happened to be just the verse I needed.  Although I haven't quite found out the full extent to how those verses will end up meaning in my life, but I'm sure the clarification is not too far away.  But one thing I do know, God is using me! Which has been my prayer since I was a little girl.  In what shape or form? I have no idea.  But I am eager to know!

Well because of my amazing breakthrough last night I received another one of those bad dreams again.  The devil is trying to remind me of how (falsely) good it felt to indulge in my past sins.  You know what? Ain't gunna happen! I have felt what true JOY feels like.  There is nothing that compares.  No sin can ever make me this happy.  So here I am, standing (well actually sitting in a chair) this morning, ready.  Here I am Lord, use me!

And for all you spiritual prayer warriors out there! I sure could use some prayer! :) And even if you're not a prayer warrior, your prayer still counts!

Friday, August 6, 2010

Disheartened

A little while ago I started having Car problems.  Too much to fix.  I have a 99' Oldsmobile Intrigue that has been faithful to me since I was 17.  One by one more issues started to surface these past couple months.  It was decided to have my dad drive it back to Sioux Falls (where he lives) and see if it is worth fixing or not and to see how much the car would be worth. 

The news came today with news that still shocks me but yet somehow seemed expected.  The engine is shot, a complete goner.  I didn't have the most diligent amount of oil changes and found out that had a part in why in the engine is failing.  So now I am feeling quite devastated, especially knowing it was my lack of care that provided some of the mishaps.  I've definitely learned my lesson now.  It was my first car, my only car, and now I have to buy a new one.  Although I am slightly excited that a change will take place.  I always love it when something new comes along but I am saddened to see my faithful car go. 

Living on my own since I was 18, I don't have any major debts besides a small credit card and now the thought of putting my self into a major debt in buying a car scares me a little.  God has been showing his faithfulness and love through these trying times the past few months, so I know he will provide for this new car.  He's provided me with so much already. 

Needless to say, I am a mixture of emotions right now, but mainly I am beating myself up a little bit.  That of which know needs to stop, beating yourself up is never a good option.  I'm going to stand up and face my consequences as a mature young adult.  Oye ...I'm ready. 

Wednesday, August 4, 2010

Missionary Liz

So, there's this amazing girl who happens to be friends with me (Lord know's why! hehe just kidding) And I love her to death. She's been there for me during my dark days and during my great days.  I'm just so excited for what God has in store for this woman.  I thought I would introduce her to you.  Her name is Elizabeth (Liz) Prichard.  The Lord has put in her heart to go to Ghana.  In the past, she went to Ghana two times for mission trips and ever since then, her heart never came with her back to Minnesota, it was left in Ghana.  This woman has one of the biggest hearts I know.  She received an opportunity a while ago to go to Ghana and be a Missionary Associate for two years.  You better believe she's stoked!! I'm so happy for her! Although I am going to sincerely miss her while she is away, I know it would be extremely selfish of me to hold her back. 

If you have the time, I would love for you to pray for my dear friend.  She's going out to the spiritual battlefield, that of which doesn't make the devil the least bit happy.  If you can pray for protection, money to fall in her lap for her fundraising, and that she can reach so many people in Ghana for Jesus.  Pray that she can be light, a light that I know her to be.  She's going to do great!

I want to personally thank her for everything and to let her know, that I will be praying for her. She will always have a poke waiting for her on Facebook. (we have poke wars) I wish her the best!

If you would like to find out more about her, feel free to visit her website, where there is a whole site filled with more information and financial support information.  If you have it on your heart to give, as one who personally knows her, I assure you, she is a great missionary to support.  Here is her website...


You Go Girl!