Do you ever say yes to something that from the outside doesn't look that bad? But once you get started it slowly starts its perilous descent? Pretty soon you can be wrapped around its prickly evil little finger and you've become so engulfed in it that when you finally blink back to reality, you don't even know how you got that far?
This past weekend I happened to have nothing really planned. I had originally intended it to be a laid back relaxing weekend and to maybe get some house cleaning done, which, is desperately needed I might add! I decided instead, to go on the computer and play some games. Unfortunately I made the wrong choice and the game I played had some personal issue related content that I thought I could steer away from. It started out well I was just playing my game and everything was fine. Little did I know that the devil was going to slowly creep in the issue related stuff. Pretty soon hours were passing buy and I found myself sometimes not even blinking! My eyes stung so badly that night once I finally got off. I know one thing, the devil got pretty close to my breaking point using that outlet. He got me at a time I was vulnerable. Once I finally got out of my game-trance. I realized my error. I felt so bad, ashamed, and guilty. Thankfully I stopped myself before anything really bad happened. The good news to this story is that my Lord filled me up with determination and strength once I asked for forgiveness. I was overflowing! It was amazing. It was the kind of thing that I took the CD for the game, took a candle lighter and BURNED it! I literally burned it! Then! Once it had melted a little bit, I snapped it in half and through the whole thing in the garbage! HA! Geez! If you need proof that God forgives you when you humbly ask, there it is right there. I find it so comforting that no sin is too great for my God to forgive. When we are truly repentant, the Lord loves us so much that He not only forgives us but gives us strength to stand up to that temptation the next time it hits! I love knowing that I am not alone in this world. I love knowing that my human sinful nature can not keep me away from finding a love so grand. Genuine repentance is such a humbling thing and God LOVES a humble servant!
I can tell you one thing... the devil may have been laughing and bouncing with anticipation as his plan was starting to work... but guess what.... now he's crying in a corner and screaming , "WHY!!"
I encourage you all, if you know that a decision you are thinking of making has things that you have previously struggled with. DO NOT DO IT! We may think, "Oh I can handle this! It's not that big of a deal, I'm not going to do anything stupid!" It's a lot harder than it looks. When we place ourselves in situations that are boiling with temptation, just avoid it. Avoid it at all costs. One thing you will never find is a recovering alcoholic in a liquor store! If you do, more than likely they are not "recovering" anymore. Temptation is very tempting! :)